With nearly 20 years of helping the kink community under My belt, I felt the need to speak up last week. In the first part of My blog into kink volunteerism, I examined the noble intentions behind volunteering and its potential to create positive change in communities. I also broke down the darker side of … [Tell me more…]
At the start of 2024, I set out to tick off 40 items as I turned 40. How many kinky items did I get to? Just ONE. I’m going to ignore all the things My recovering perfectionist of a brain is saying, and simply say I am disappointed. I thought I had a great plan … [Tell me more…]
Breaking up in a BDSM power exchange dynamic can be particularly challenging due to the unique emotional, psychological, and structural elements of the relationship. These breakups often feel more difficult for all involved. This is noticeable as part of what makes these relationships so special, is the depths and expansiveness of where they reach. Power … [Tell me more…]
Navigating BDSM social and, in my case, a professional space often requires interaction with a wide range of people, groups, and organizations. From event hosts, to start-up kinky ventures and community acquaintances to people you may not particularly like, the world is full of diverse personalities. However, the notion that being polite and maintaining a … [Tell me more…]
It’s that time of year again… It’s LOCK-FRIGGIN-TOBER!! *clears throat* Apologies. As you all may know, I am obsessed with a chastity play. I am a bit fanatical with chastity play. 95% of the partners I’ve played with and had serve Me over the years, were required to enforced chastity in some way or another. … [Tell me more…]
i had just finished getting ready for bed when Mistress came into the room and asked me if i had enough energy to have some fun. Even if i was much more tired than i was, the answer would have still been an automatic and enthusiastic “Yes!” “Good” Mistress said “A deal has been struck … [Tell me more…]
The kink and BDSM community is an effervescent, diverse space where individuals explore their fantasies, desires, and boundaries. I’ve learned after two decades within the community what’s really important. At the heart of this exploration are two fundamental principles: consent and privacy. These principles not only ensure the safety and well-being of participants but also foster … [Tell me more…]
I am be ranting but follow me… Ever since I was a kid, I hated my name. Genuinely distasted being called it. My parents thought it would a great idea to combine their two names (I see you other Black families!). In theory this can work, in practice it usually ends up feeling forced. I … [Tell me more…]
Over the years I’ve pondered some important questions… But my latest one has not stopped niggling in the back of my mind… Am I Queer? But what is ‘Queer’ anyway I’ve thought often. Is it a sexual orientation? A gender identity or expression? A community and culture flair? After years of reading, examining, and listening … [Tell me more…]