Beat around the bush

I met a gardener and he’s the first person I’ve found who can cure my black thumb.

The Gardener came into my life last year by way of a crossdresser’s munch. Puppy and I attended and weren’t expecting much. But, I did talk with The Gardener most of the evening. He invited the two of us to a kinky, sexy hotel party and I’m never one to turn down a good time. It wasn’t a good time. Not through any fault of his own, it just wasn’t what we expected. However, this didn’t deter me from pursuing a friendship with him.

Fast forward to a few months ago when we had our first one-on-one dinner that he cooked for me, fully dressed from head to heels at my request. One thing lead to another and before you knew it, my phone was showing the time as 3am. I’ve found if I can chat with you for more than 60 minutes and it doesn’t feel forced, that’s a good sign, so we kept talking. And kept talking.

Each day we’d continue one of the previous late night’s conversation and delve into a world of new topics afterward. The more he talked the more I listened. The more interested he was in what I had to say, the more interesting I felt. Every crazy story I had, he had a rival one of his own.

Intellectual foreplay at its finest.

In this time admittedly, things have moved fast for us. More fast than I think anyone expected. A big part of this is due to the fact that we live within a few miles radius of each other and keep a similar (non)sleeping schedule. Late night chatting became lunches, lunches turned to titillating flirting and that grew into much more.

The Gardner is good at his craft.

He is an actual self-taught gardener, polyamorous crossdresser, who is a great home chef, and can be a complete goofball when he remembers to relax (which takes some coaxing). He’s a musician (i.e. good with his hands), a father, a self-proclaimed sensualist and I’m finding out so much more. Each layer I peel back reveals just a peek at the one underneath it. It’s a beehive of vulnerability and genuineness that has been a relief to be a sharer of.

I walked into his home for dinner a few months ago not expecting anything at all. Neither of us did. But as all gardeners know they shouldn’t let the grass grow under their feet and we decided despite our best efforts to just give in and turn over a new leaf together.

It wasn’t the most convenient of times after Puppy left but something that started out small bloomed into something much bigger and I can’t wait to see what the harvest is like.

Would I have chosen to start dating The Gardner this way? Probably not.

Is it a bit of a challenge navigating a new relationship while just starting an international long distance engagement? Absolutely.

Have I been honest with my other partners along the way about my new experience. Of course.

If I could change it would I? I think philosopher Francis Bacon put it best…

“Gardening is the purest of human pleasures.”